Monday, September 6, 2010

outside the pen

((((..."love, don't cry"...)))

if i face myself, as another,
it is even more an animal
outside of the pen

if i make myself proud about you,
you could move away from me.
the difference is i don't know.
(hush
because i'm too scared to ask)))))))).

i'm too smart for this, in life:
i have only learned a love
the way i am to you...
pay no attention
how you are to me
this is inconstant
it's not a tongue i understand
if you go because of me,
then do i suffer, so that
you are well enough to stay?
(((((knowing full well you are
one thing i do not get
and i get that i do not know)))

this is the sadness, always

and if it is not there,
i will force it in
where the skin is not broke

can you topple that?

i cannot lead

i can't even

this
sentence

I have learned
by the leaving of you
that it is to,
in your absence
find the point
in a sea of softness
and weak
(there can be no point found)>>>>>

i have evaporated
every new event
registering
blows the dust of me
off the table

i didn't feel the sadness with you
this is why i think
you'll stay

(forgive me
this is a day
too cut
around the edges
and too many shards
smashed together
in one match-box